A “smile moment” to start with

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Why did I start this blog in the first place? Well, I am a business woman, a young business woman, I can even say – a business girl. My position suggests me to be serious at work. The inner me is not like that though. I have to adapt myself to a business environment that exists in some companies. There are still several clients whom I am having lots of laughs with.

I started thinking of a personal blog a long time ago, but didn’t have that specific theme to write about. I usually have lots of ideas, but don’t have personal time. I usually had time only for business. That’s why I was writing my company’s business blog (btw, I am going to continue writing it anyways, so you are welcome to follow it :)). It was not enough for me though. Sometimes I’d like to share some thoughts that wouldn’t fit my business page. Those thoughts were diverse and I didn’t know how to put them into one blog. It would have been just a mess.

So last week one of my colleagues came to the office a bit later and I was thinking on something (don’t remember what exactly). She said usual hellos and then came to me with the question: “is something wrong?”. I was surprised to hear that as everything was as usual for me. But she continued: “you are not smiling, – it’s not normal”. That hit me. I do usually smile and I do usually joke around in the office. I was taking it for granted, but many people see me as a smiley and funny person. I was trying to define myself as someone or something for so long and it was so easy to do!

This year was a bit rough for me bringing some more troubles than the previous year, lots of projects at work, trips, meetings, paperwork for the newly registered company of mine – The Divine Communications. Very proud of myself and my team of supporters – my family, friends and… no, not fools, – my “fairy” accountant, whom I couldn’t have done so much without. So yes, it was a tough start of the year, then recently I found myself in an unexpected and unusual state – I stopped smiling. I was so tired and exhausted that I didn’t want to. I had to force myself to do simple act of emotional reaction to the outside world that is called “smile”. That was really strange for me. That was the time I realized how precious are those times when something, or even better, – someone, makes you smile!

Step by step I came back to myself, I started walking, reading, doing exercise and came back to play tennis. I wanted to start running, but it’s not for me. Walking is another thing. I do walk and walk a lot lately. That makes me feel better, helps focusing and thinking straight.

IMG_20150604_232617My friends are complaining about the amount of “business” in my life. Even here in my personal blog there will be business. Yes, business is a part of my life and it will never change. However, I balanced my time this year and now I have more time for myself, for my friends and for my books.

I’ve always dreamed about writing a book. Never knew what it would be about, but always wanted to make it. I have this strange will for writing and sharing. Sharing is already working – I sometimes teach, I also work as a consultant so I share my knowledge for living. However, writing was always difficult. I thought I was a bad writer, – I was shy to write and share my ideas in a blog, I couldn’t complete my posts, – basically, I had lots of excuses not to write (I bet you also experienced that).

So now – no excuses. I write, because I want to and I have something to share. I am getting organized in my personal life as well. I know that this blog will make me notice things I haven’t been noticing before. For example, today while walking towards the ocean I took an unusual route for me and I found a beautiful street hidden in between houses. I used to take this road to go for my Portuguese course, but I have never seen this street.

So here we go… “Smile moment” #1 – feeling proud of myself for finalizing my very first post in my very-not-so-first personal blog. I wish myself a success and lots of “smiling moments”!

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